I cannot hide from my wife that I don’t enjoy shopping, which is strange because I spend all the hours of the week trying to earn a few cents, so you would think that I would enjoy going out at the end of the week and spending some of them – sadly no
As we park the car, I try to be positive by smiling at my wife. Used to the Grumpy Old Man, she starts to get worried thinking I must be sickening for something.
We approach the Hyper Mall. It is HUGE. It is ALIEN. I wish I was walking across Exmoor or Dartmoor or any moor in the world … Or any other WORLD.
I pause at the entrance. The automatic door bashes me in my back, almost knocking me to the floor. Apparently, you are not allowed to stand on the threshold and pluck up courage to enter. My wife breezes ahead, looking in her element and enjoying her retail therapy.
I look at the huge auditorium packed with people of all shapes and sizes and wonder where to start. My wife suggests we meet at the central seating area, if we get separated.
I suggest Air Sea Rescue. She is not amused.
I wander around for two hours wondering why everybody looks so sad.
Probably they can’t find the Public Library either!
By for now
Rob
